The Homecoming
by Midie
Summary: It's Christmastime, and the ParkerNichols family receives a letter in the mail which makes Audrey happy, but Drake isn't as joyous as his mother.
1. Candy Cane Label

_The Homecoming_

Disclaimer: All characters, etc. belong to their proper owners.

A/N: This is a collaborative effort on the part of me and AlisonLydon here, so you're going to get elements from both of us. This'll be interesting. It is set at Christmastime, so you get it now. Let's see where it goes, shall we?

_Chapter One: Candy Cane Label_

* * *

Drake Parker couldn't believe his luck. He was failing English. Well, that was no surprise. He was used to that. But now Mrs. Hayfer wasn't suggesting a tutor or remedial English or a little sibling. No, this time she decided to pull out some extra credit, but not just any extra credit, mind you. This was extra credit designed to humiliate him. And he didn't have any choice. If he didn't pass this year, he was in severe danger of not graduating. First he had to be in the Christmas pageant...oh, the Holiday pageant. Students like Craig and Eric had to feel like they were a part of the holiday celebration. Then he had to go caroling with the choir. The same choir that stole his song from him at the talent show a few years ago and nearly beat him with it. This was completely ridiculous. What did that have to do with English? Okay, so they were studying plays, but caroling with the choir? Who was Mrs. Hayfer kidding? He knew why she added that to his agony: she hated him. 

Why must he be burdened with these things during the holidays? It meant he had to hang around the school after all classes were dismissed to rehearse. It also meant he had to hang around with Hewitt and the Belleview High Choral Society Clones. Some Christmas this was going to be. Days he could spend searching for his gifts were going to be spent learning harmonies that must be of perfection. It was enough to make him gag. Not to mention the fact that he now had lines to learn. At least it would all be over come Christmas break. The moment he got home, he was not going to touch a single book. Not that he did now, but that wasn't the point.

He had just gotten home from one of these rehearsals that he couldn't stand. To make the day even more enjoyable, the student director had yelled at him in front of the entire cast for not knowing his lines. The girl really needed to calm down. So what if he couldn't remember what he was supposed to say? What, he was going to ruin the play because he couldn't remember six lines of dialogue? Did anyone care who St. Nicholas really was? All kids cared about these days was Santa Claus and the presents they were going to get that year.

Drake walked into the kitchen, in search of food.

"Don't eat now, Drake," said Audrey. "You'll spoil your dinner."

Drake sighed. At the age of seventeen, he still couldn't eat before dinner. He'd be good and hungry again in another hour. What was the point in waiting? He walked into the living room when Megan did.

"Megan, would you please get the mail, sweetie?" Audrey called from the kitchen.

"Drake said he'd get it," Megan called back.

"I did not," Drake said.

"Just go get it," said Megan, running back up the stairs.

Drake shook his head and went to get the mail. Megan couldn't do one simple task, could she? Drake was disappointed that Josh wasn't home yet. Otherwise, Drake could have made him do it.

Drake carried the mail back inside, flipping through the stack. Bill, bill, Christmas card, credit card application, bill, a letter. Letters didn't come very often. The handwritten word used in communication was quickly fading. Drake glanced at the return address. Cambridge, Massachusetts. Drake frowned and tossed the mail on the counter.

"Thank you, Drake," said his mother.

Drake ignored her, though. The perfect little letter in a perfect little green envelope with a perfect little candy cane stamp in the corner. The address was even written in perfect handwriting. It made Drake sick to his stomach. He would have thought it was another Christmas card had it not been the size of a regular envelope. Then he saw the return address. He knew it wasn't a card. It was a letter. And Drake would sell his fender strat for half of what it was worth before he read that letter.


	2. So, What's the Good News?

_Chapter Two: So...What's the Good News?_

* * *

Drake wasn't a huge meatloaf fan. Especially when it came to his mother's. And ever since Josh's foot resembled it, he couldn't stomach it at all, but now he was going to get another reason to leave it on his plate untouched. His mother was about to make an announcement that, to her, was wonderful news. 

"Guess what?" said Audrey, clearly happy about whatever she had to say.

"What is it?" asked Walter, not sure why his wife would be this excited.

"A letter came from Aiden today. It's always wonderful to hear from him."

"I'm sure it is," Walter replied.

Drake pushed his mashed potatoes around with his fork. What was Mr. Perfect up to now? Had he excelled at Harvard and graduated already? Was he going to be the legal advisor to the president? Or was he somehow going to help the pope with something? Drake knew he was getting ridiculous with his thoughts, but he really didn't think he cared to hear what his mother was going to say. Little did he know, he was going to hate what his mother had to say.

"He says things are going well at Harvard," Audrey continued. "His grades have been so high, and everyone likes him so much. He has quite the gang of friends."

Drake stopped listening to Audrey talk about Aiden. He didn't care. He didn't want to care. So what if Aiden was the top of his class wherever he went? So what if he was going to be a lawyer? Drake began to use his fork and knife to shape his mashed potatoes to keep his mind from what his mother was saying. However, he did look up when he heard the words, "coming home for Christmas."

"What?" Drake asked, startled.

"Aiden's coming home this Christmas!" Audrey said with glee. "Isn't it wonderful, Drake? Your big brother's coming home."

"Yeah, wonderful," said Drake. He still didn't care, but he had also completely lost his appetite. He had been waiting for dessert, but now even that seemed unappealing.

"That will be nice," said Walter. "Josh and I haven't met him yet."

"I know," said Audrey. "It's a shame he was too busy at the time of the wedding."

Drake frowned. That's right. Aiden hadn't even been at his own mother's wedding. Not that Drake himself had been thrilled at first that his mom was marrying Walter, but at least he'd been there. Aiden said he had too much going on to come home for a wedding. Really. What was more important? And how could their mom have forgiven him that easily for it?

"Megan, you haven't seen him in a long time either," Audrey continued. "Won't it be nice to see him again?"

"I guess so, Mom," said Megan. She'd been watching Drake mess around with his food. She knew he didn't like meatloaf, but he wasn't one to leave everything else on his plate untouched.

"Well, we're going to have to get everything ready. He'll be here in two days," Audrey said. "We should probably give him the guest bedroom. I wouldn't want him to have to sleep on the boys' couch."

Drake put his fork down. He was done now. It irritated him that his mother was willing to do all this for Aiden. He hadn't been at her wedding. He'd never met her new husband or step-son. He'd never visited or written to Megan. All they got was a letter once in a while saying how his grades were and how many friends he had. Audrey was excited whenever mail came from him. Drake didn't give a damn. Megan didn't seem to either, but she had never really known Aiden very well.

Drake slipped out of his chair and headed upstairs. His mother wouldn't notice. She was too busy saying how wonderful it was that Mr. Perfect was going to come home in two days. Let her have her perfect son. Drake had other things to do. Like practice with the choir. Anything was better than being home with Aiden. He'd much rather put up with Hewitt.

He debated about picking up his guitar or turning on the television. He finally settled on the television and turned on _OR_. He switched the channel to whatever mindless non-reality show was on the so called Music Television.

Drake was fifteen minutes into a rerun of _Celebrities Under Water_ when Josh came upstairs.

"Hey," said Josh. "We wondered why you left."

"I wasn't hungry," Drake replied.

"Not hungry? You were complaining about how Mom wouldn't let you eat before dinner."

"So?"

"So what's up?"

"Nothing."

"Drake," Josh sighed. "Are you still bummed about having to carol with the choir and having to be in the holiday pageant?"

"Oh, I'm past being bummed about that, Josh. Way past that."

"Then what's the matter?"

"You don't get it do you?"

"No. You haven't really given me anything to 'get.'"

Drake stared at Josh.

"Why don't you explain?" Josh offered.

"Don't you get it? When did I leave the table?"

"After Mom announced that Aiden was coming home in two days."

"Now was that so hard?" Drake asked.

"Why would you be upset about your brother coming home?"

"He's never been there, Josh. He's always been away. I haven't seen him since he went away to college, and actually, I'm fine with that."

"Why? Don't you miss him?"

"Nope. Would you miss the brother who didn't go to your mother's wedding?"

"He was busy..."

"Yeah, right. Too busy to go to his own mother's wedding? I don't think so, Josh."

"Well, maybe he..."

"Josh, he didn't want to go to the wedding. He just had something to do with his friends that he didn't want to cancel. He's never really cared. He just acts like it. And Mom treats him like a perfect angel for it."

"Drake, no one's perfect."

"You're right. So why does he act like he is?"

"Don't you think you're being a little over..."

"No. I don't care what happens to him. If he wants to walk out and forget about everybody, that's his business. I'm not going to sit around and wait for him to come home. So what if he's coming home for Christmas? That's what you're supposed to do, and it's the first time he's done it in years."

"Why are you so bitter toward your older brother?"

"Huh. Some brother. No, Josh. He wasn't at Mom and Dad's wedding. I just can't take that."

"Mom just sounds so happy. I don't know why..."

"She's giving him the guest bedroom, Josh. You didn't get that when you moved in, remember? You slept on the couch until we moved the drumset out and moved your bed here."

"Wasn't the guest bedroom his to begin with? And I didn't mind the couch. I'm family."

"He's supposed to be too, isn't he? No, we used to share a room. The drumset came in soon after he moved out."

"Why?"

"Does it matter why? Scottie had just got a brand new set at the time, and he wanted somewhere to put the old one, so the drums were here for a while. The old bed just got moved out of the room."

"Oh. Well, he's going to be in the guestroom like it or not."

"I never said I didn't like it. I'd rather not sleep in the same room as him."

"Why not?" Josh asked.

"You wouldn't understand," said Drake. "You were an only child before Walter married Mom. Sometimes brothers can drive you nuts when the age difference is just right."

"You've both grown up since then, though..."

"Trust me, Josh, I just don't want to deal with it. I spent my whole life dealing with him before he moved out. I'm not going to say I miss the guy who missed my mom's wedding."

"All right," said Josh. "I can't make you change your mind. I suppose you do have a point. Although, I wonder what he was doing the day of Mom and Dad's wedding."

"It doesn't matter," Drake replied. "The point is, he wasn't there. They got married in the summer. He had no excuse."

"If you say so," Josh responded.

"Just forget it. I've got to go practice with the band. These pageant and caroling rehearsals are really messing with our schedule."

With that, Drake grabbed his guitar and headed out the door. Josh stared after Drake wondering exactly what it was that had kept Aiden from their parents' wedding. Could it be as Drake said, or had he had a good reason? Josh shrugged and switched on his GameSphere. There was no point in digging deeper into the matter. It had happened, and it was over. Audrey apparently didn't seem to mind and neither did Walter. Josh would make his judgement when he met Aiden.


	3. Give 'em an Act with Lots of Flash in It

_Chapter Three: Give 'em an Act with Lots of Flash in It_

* * *

The drawers were perfectly cleaned. The bed was perfectly made. The closet was perfectly cleared. The bathroom was perfectly scrubbed. The kitchen was perfectly polished. Why didn't Audrey just turn down his sheets and leave Aiden a mint on his pillow as well? 

Drake passed the guestroom. He couldn't bear to look inside at the neatness of it all. His mom never cleaned it that well when other company came. No, this was a special case. It was her perfect son. Drake shut the bedroom door. It was too much perfection for his taste.

He headed downstairs and passed by the kitchen. Audrey was making Aiden's favorite for dinner, of course. She'd even baked an apple pie and bought his favorite ice cream for dessert. She didn't notice Drake as he walked by the kitchen. She was bent over the stove, stirring in a pot. Drake glanced over in the living room where Josh and Megan were playing a board game. Drake noticed Megan slip something into Josh's Diet Mocha Cola. Josh was going to get it, whatever it was.

Drake collapsed in a chair in the living room. Aiden would be there in about fifteen minutes, and he would be on time. Aiden would never be late.

"Cheer up," said Josh. "Your brother's coming home today."

"Why do you think I'm acting like this?" Drake responded.

Megan glanced over at Drake, but she didn't say anything. Audrey thought Megan was glad that Aiden was coming home. Drake didn't know how Megan felt. She hadn't seen Aiden for as long as Drake had, and she'd been very young when he did leave for school. Drake had often thought if Aiden cared for his family, he wouldn't have gone to school on the east coast. He would have stayed on the west.

"I know you're still upset about what we talked about the other day, but can't you forget about it? Mom and Dad have."

"I know that," said Drake. "But..."

"Blech!" Josh exclaimed. "Megan, what'd you do to my Mocha Cola?"

"What do you think I did to it?" Megan asked sweetly.

"You put something in it. I swear, if this makes me sick..."

"Calm down. It's just sour candy powder. It's not going to make you sick."

Josh frowned at Megan and carried his drink into the kitchen to dump it down the sink.

"That was too easy," said Megan to Drake.

"I guess..." Drake replied.

"What's the matter with you? You act like you don't want to see Aiden again."

"Trust me. I don't care if I never see him again."

"Does Mom know that?" Megan asked, raising her eyebrow.

"No," he replied. "How could she think that anyone would not want to see Aiden?"

"I guess so," Megan responded. Drake's attitude lately was strange. Ever since the announcement that Aiden was coming home, he seemed to act completely down. She knew something had to have happened to depress Drake like that, but she didn't know what it was.

"Drake, Megan," said Audrey. "Aiden's here!"

Drake sighed. Megan gave him a glance again and headed toward the door with her mother. Audrey opened the door and threw her arms around her first-born son.

"Oh, Aiden, I'm so happy to see you," she said.

"It's great to see you too, Mom," Aiden replied. They broke their hug, and Aiden looked at Megan. "Wow. The last time I saw you, you were really small. You're becoming a beautiful young lady."

Drake dug his nails into the arm of the chair. If Aiden had been around, he would have seen that already.

Josh came out of the kitchen and shook Aiden's hand.

"How are you?" asked Josh.

"I'm good, Josh. It's nice to finally meet you."

"Walter's at work right now. He has to do the five o'clock news, but he'll be home for dinner," said Audrey.

"All right," said Aiden. "Now, where's my little brother?"

"Drake," said Audrey. "Come say hello to your brother."

Drake slowly got up from the chair and made his way to the front door. He stared at the person before him. It was a lot like looking into a mirror. And Drake might have thought he was looking into a mirror if it weren't for that smirk on Aiden's face. A smirk Drake would _never_ use on anyone.

"Aiden," he said, shaking his hand.

"Drake," Aiden responded. "How is my little brother?"

"Just fine," Drake replied.

"Good," Aiden said.

"Drake," said Audrey. "Why don't you help Aiden take his bags up to the guestroom."

"Yes, Mom," Drake said through clenched teeth.

"I've got to go finish dinner," she continued. "Megan, come help me, please."

"Yes, Mom," said Megan, following her into the kitchen.

"Hey, let me help," said Josh, picking up one of the bags and proceeding up the stairs, leaving Drake and Aiden still at the door. Brothers by blood who hadn't seen each other in five years.

"You may have everyone else in the house believing this 'Mr. Perfect' act, but I'm not buying it," Drake said.

"Why, my dear little brother," said Aiden. "I have no idea what you mean. Take this suitcase, will you?" He shoved one of his suitcases at Drake's chest which caused Drake to have to take a step backward. Drake was shocked for a moment, but he shook off that feeling. It was nothing new.

Drake turned and headed up the stairs to lead Aiden to the guestroom. Drake was actually looking forward to school the next day. He wouldn't have to deal with this while he was there.

"'Mr. Perfect,'" Aiden went on. "Drake, I don't know what you're talking about. No one's perfect."

"You're right," said Drake. "_No one._"

* * *

Drake wasn't even eating his dinner, but he still felt like he wanted to throw up. He couldn't stand that his mother had spent two and a half hours cooking dinner that night. All for what? For the son who left home five years ago and didn't even go to his own mother's wedding. Yes, that's what. 

Walter was delighted by Aiden the moment he met him. Aiden got on his good side by saying how hard it must be to be a weatherman. If anyone hated the weather, they sometimes blamed the weatherman, and that wasn't fair. Drake wanted nothing more than to go back upstairs and bury himself in his blankets until morning came and he could go to school. Drake Parker wanted to go to school. Incredible.

"Of course, law school hasn't been a walk in the park, but I've managed to keep my grades up," Aiden was saying.

"I can't imagine how difficult it is," said Audrey. "I'm so glad to hear you're doing well."

"Mmm hmm," said Aiden.

Audrey stood up and began to clear the plates.

"Drake, aren't you hungry?" she asked, glancing at his untouched food.

"Not really, Mom," Drake said.

"All right," said Audrey. She hurried into the kitchen and returned with her apple pie and ice cream.

"So, what were you thinking of doing, Josh?" asked Aiden.

"Uh," said Josh. "Well, I kind of wanted to be a teacher. I just found out a little while ago that I might not be very good at it, though," he said, giving Megan a look as Audrey placed a piece of pie and scoop of ice cream on Josh's plate.

"Oh, anyone doing anything could stand improvement," said Aiden. "I'm sure things would get better. And if not, have you been thinking of anything else?"

"Well, if Drake's band makes it big, I'll probably still be managing him. That would be awesome."

Drake's fork clattered against the plate where he dropped it. He had been planning on eating his pie, but he knew he was about to lose his appetite for even that.

"You still haven't given that up?" Aiden asked glancing over at Drake with the smirk he'd greeted his younger brother with earlier that day.

"No, I haven't," said Drake.

"Drake, Drake," said Aiden, shaking his head. "Isn't it time to be a bit more realistic? I mean, you graduate in less than two years."

"I am being realistic," said Drake. "The band actually has a pretty good shot."

"That's what they all think, little brother. I just don't want you to set yourself up for disappointment."

"Well, that's fine," said Drake. "But I'm not."

"Drake," said Audrey. "There's truth in what Aiden says."

Drake growled in his throat. His mom had always told him he was born under a lucky star. Good things would always happen for him. Now that all changed because her oldest child came home and said his dreams couldn't come true?

Drake got up from the table and went upstairs. He wasn't going to come down until morning, and that was that. He refused to look at Aiden anymore that day.

Josh followed him a short while later.

"You know," said Josh, "for a guy who missed our parents' wedding, he seems really nice. Maybe it was just a misunderstanding."

"Right," said Drake. "A misunderstanding. And I'm the queen."

"Are you just sore for what he said about the band?"

"That's only a tiny part of why I'm sore, Josh."

"He is right, you know," said Josh.

"What?"

"You might not land a record deal."

"Well, thank you for having faith in me," Drake replied icily. "Good to know my brother has my back."

"Drake, I didn't mean..."

"Then say what you mean," said Drake, flopping down on the couch and staring hard at the black television screen.

"Drake, I only meant that it's hard."

"I know. You think I'm that dumb? I've heard so many stories about people who try to make it but end up with nothing. But you know something, that's no reason to quit. I don't care what the odds are. I don't care what Aiden says. That's what I want to do."

"All right," said Josh. "Forget it." He walked over to his backpack and pulled out his science book. "You know," Josh continued, "you two look a lot alike."

"So?"

"So you just do look like brothers. Like you could be twins if it weren't for something...but I can't quite put my finger on it. It's crazy, it really is. Do you both look like your dad?"

"Yes," Drake said quietly. "We both look like Dad."

"Wow. It's just, even the hair, and..."

"Okay, Josh."

"What?"

"That's enough."

"Why?"

"It just is. You know this bothers me."

"Why should it bother you?"

"Because...oh, it's complicated. It just bothers me, and I'd rather not discuss why right now. I've got a long day tomorrow, and I'd just like to relax before I have to run from school to pageant rehearsal to chorus rehearsal to band practice."

"Okay," said Josh, "but I'd understand a whole lot more if you'd tell me what was going on."

"It's not as simple as that," said Drake. "You just couldn't understand."


	4. What You Own

_Chapter Four: What You Own_

* * *

Josh headed upstairs after working that afternoon at the Premiere. Drake still wouldn't be home yet because of his rehearsals, so why did he hear music coming from their bedroom? Josh opened the door and had to do a double take to see Aiden sitting on the loft, as Drake and Aiden looked a lot alike, playing Drake's most prized guitar, his cherry red fender stratocaster signed by Devon Malone that he'd won from a radio station which Josh had to replace because he accidently set fire to it. Drake cherished that guitar. And Drake wasn't exactly on friendly terms with his older brother, so how would he respond to this? Not in a good way. 

"Hi," said Josh, wondering what Aiden was doing in the room in the first place.

"Hey," said Aiden, glancing up from his playing.

"Uh, you know, that's Drake's favorite guitar for obvious reasons. I'm just wondering how he'd feel to see you playing it."

"Hmm," Aiden smirked. He continued to play. He stopped for a moment and jumped down from the loft.

"I just figured, he might not be very happy."

"Maybe not," said Aiden. He began playing again. He was good. He definitely knew what he was doing. He began to play again.

"Wow," said Josh. "You're good."

"Thanks."

"Could you play something you wrote?"

"Hmm? Oh, I never wrote anything. It took too much time. It was easier just to play the songs I liked. Besides, I never really wanted to do much with the guitar anyway. Maybe when I was younger I had silly little dreams of being a rockstar, but I matured fast, and I decided I didn't want to do that anymore.

"I see," Josh responded.

* * *

Drake was ready to deck Hewitt. If he complained about his blending one more time, Hewitt's lip was going to meet Drake's fist. Then the student director of the holiday pageant...Drake knew if he started on her, he wouldn't stop. 

He climbed the stairs to his bedroom. He had to get his guitar before going to band rehearsal, but wait. Did he hear someone playing guitar? Josh couldn't play. As much as Drake tried to teach him, Josh just couldn't play. He did like to mess around and pluck the strings sometimes, but that was all he was able to do. So when Drake heard a Led Zeppelin song, he knew there was only one person who could be playing that at the moment. He frowned and opened his bedroom door.

"What are you doing?" he asked, staring at Aiden.

Aiden stopped playing. He smirked again.

"What does it look like I'm doing?" he asked Drake.

"Playing my guitar," Drake replied.

"Now was that so hard?" asked Aiden.

Drake's eyebrows came down. What was he doing?

"Just put it down," Drake responded.

Aiden frowned, but he set the guitar back down.

"Funny because you wouldn't have any interest in it if I hadn't played it in the first place," Aiden said.

"Whatever," said Drake. "Just don't touch my guitars. You quit anyway."

"But even you have to admit, no one could resist not playing that guitar," Aiden said, raising an eyebrow.

"Why do you think I don't want anyone to touch it?" Drake asked bitterly.

"Well, we're not in a good mood today, are we, little brother?"

Drake growled in his throat.

"Just leave it alone," said Drake. "It doesn't belong to you."

"Didn't we learn about sharing in kindergarten, little brother?"

"I'm not going to talk grade school etiquette with you."

"Oh, really?" asked Aiden. "Big word etiquette."

"Would you just get out?" Drake responded, growing more and more flustered by the moment. He glanced over to where Aiden's cell phone was sitting on his bed. "Were you up on the loft?" Drake asked.

"Maybe. Does it matter?"

"Kinda. That's my bed!"

"Whatever," said Aiden, grabbing his phone. "You just lucked out because I moved out." Aiden left the room and shut the door behind him.

"What did that mean?" Josh asked.

"Nothing," said Drake.

"Nothing?"

"That's right, nothing. Don't bother me about this now." Drake sat down on the couch and kept a blank stare. Finally he spoke again. "I don't see why he has to touch my guitar. His old one is still around. The one I use to rehearse. He could have used that, but no, he touches my baby."

"Drake, it's just a guitar..."

"You know very well what that guitar means, Josh," said Drake, jumping up from where he sat. "You freaked and replaced it, remember? And it's not just the guitar itself, it's the principal. That's my guitar." Drake sighed and kept his head turned away from Josh.

"You're right. I know what it means to you."

"Not entirely," said Drake. He kept quiet after that. He didn't speak again for a while.

"So, Aiden played first?" Josh asked.

Drake was quiet for a moment but soon responded, "Yeah. He quit playing after a while, but I was always still interested in it." Drake was silent for the next few minutes. Josh soon decided Drake wasn't going to speak again, so he headed for the door. As he placed his hand on the doorknob, he heard Drake's voice. "Aiden used to sleep on the loft. I used to want it, but it was his place. That's why he said I was lucky. Because he moved out and I finally got what I wanted. That's what that means."


	5. Nightmares and Hateful Teachers

_Chapter Five: Nightmares and Hateful Teachers_

* * *

Drake turned over in his bed. He was still fast asleep and enjoying his dreams when he felt pain shoot through his scalp. He felt cold and then felt himself tumble to the floor under the loft. He glanced up to see Aiden standing over him. 

"I'm Aiden. I get the cool bed."

Drake felt himself start to shake. Was it because he was cold? No, someone was shaking him. It was Aiden. No, wait...

"DRAKE!" Josh yelled as he shook him awake. "Are you all right?"

"What?" asked Drake, opening his eyes.

"Dude, you fell out of bed."

Drake looked around and realized he was cold because his covers had fallen off when he fell from the loft. He moved and winced in pain.

"Can you get up?" Josh asked.

"I think so," said Drake, carefully standing up. "I never realized how far my bed is from the floor."

"Yeah, it hurts to fall from there." Josh picked up Drake's blanket from the floor and handed it to him. "What happened?"

"Just a...a nightmare," Drake responded.

"Are you sure?" Josh asked.

"Of course I'm sure." Drake started to climb back up to his bed.

"Can you make it?" Josh questioned.

"Yeah, I think so. Man, I can't believe I fell like that. Stupid Aiden..."

"Whoa, Aiden?"

Drake sighed, "Nothing, Josh." But he knew the damage was done.

"What about Aiden?"

"I just dreamed he wanted the bed back."

"You call that a nightmare?"

"Yes."

"Drake, I don't think I'll ever understand you."

Drake stared at Josh.

"If you knew what actually happened when we were little, you'd understand."

"What did..."

"I need to get some sleep. The pageant's tomorrow. Even though I'm sick and tired of it, and I don't want to do it, I have to go, or I'll fail Hayfer's class."

"Okay," said Josh. "But I hope you know you can talk to me."

"Yeah, yeah," said Drake, pulling his blanket back over himself.

"Goodnight."

* * *

Drake stirred his cereal the next morning with little interest. That dream had caused him to lie awake and stare at the ceiling until 5:30 that morning when he decided he may as well get out of bed because he wasn't going to get any sleep. It was now 6:15, and he was falling asleep over his breakfast. He had the pageant that night. If he came in tired and not freshened up by sleep, the student director would have his head again, and he was tired of her yelling at him for no real reason except that she wanted to show that she had some form of power. Drake couldn't stand that about her. He'd thought she was hot when he first learned she was student director and maybe the pageant wouldn't be bad after all. He couldn't have been more wrong. She embarrassed him in front of everyone and made him look like a fool. He was lucky he was cool or it really would have bothered him. 

What irritated him even more than the pageant was the caroling that was coming. He had to go to rehearsal that day and put up with Hewitt and his friends. He didn't know which was worse, the student director, whose name he never learned or cared to know after she yelled at him the second time, or Hewitt. He just wanted both the pageant and caroling to be over so break could begin.

Drake took a bite of his cereal but hardly tasted it. All he could think about was the pageant, caroling, and Aiden. If none of those things had shown up this Christmas, it would have turned out to be a good one. But there they were.

"You're up early," said a voice that reminded Drake of his own. Drake jumped at the voice and glanced up with a nervous look on his face. He quickly changed his expression.

"So?" he asked.

"You're never up early. In fact, how many times did Mom give you the five minute warning when you were younger?"

"Whatever," said Drake, setting his bowl in the sink. He wasn't hungry. He was tired and just wanted to go back upstairs and crawl into bed. But he couldn't do that because he had school and rehearsals, and he'd get detention if he skipped now. Besides, if he went back to bed, he might dream about Aiden like that again. Or Aiden would make it a reality. No, not with their mom in the house. But Drake wouldn't put anything past him.

* * *

Drake had been sitting in his car for forty-five minutes while he waited for Josh. When Josh did arrive, he looked at Drake, puzzled, but didn't say anything until a few minutes into the drive. 

"What's up?" asked Josh.

"Nothing," Drake replied.

"You were up really early."

"I just want to get this pageant over with."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. That's all."

"I just think Aiden being here is really bothering you. Now something's gotta be up between you two."

"Just forget about it Josh. It's dumb."

"Drake..."

"I'm not going to talk about it anymore." Drake emphasized that sentence and didn't say anything else. Josh didn't either because he knew when Drake was being serious. But Josh had no idea what was wrong with his brother.

* * *

Drake couldn't help but frown as he looked out into the audience that night. What was Aiden doing there? If he had told their mom it was to support Drake, that was a laugh. Drake continued his small part in the pageant and did it without messing up as the student director feared he would. He knew how irritated she'd been with him because he managed to mess up at every rehearsal, but did she really expect someone who performed in front of people all the time to mess up a school pageant? 

But he couldn't figure out what Aiden was doing there. The only reason he would go to Drake's school plays when they were younger was because their mom made him. So what was it about now? He wasn't forced to be here. What was going on?

It didn't take Drake long to figure out. Once he met up with his family after the show, he noticed Aiden talking with Mrs. Hayfer. Drake felt the color rise in his cheeks. The reason Mrs. Hayfer hated him. She'd had his brother who was perfect, and Drake just couldn't measure up to that. Nor did he want to measure up to it. Who wanted to be locked in their room doing homework all day? Even Josh wasn't like that. He got good grades, but at least he went out and did things. All Aiden ever did was study. He said it kept his mind off of things. Wasn't going out and being social enough? That wasn't to say Aiden didn't have friends. He had a lot of them, but he only went out on Saturday night. And the girls loved him. It was enough to make Drake sick.

"I'm very thrilled to hear that law school is going well for you," Mrs. Hayfer was saying to Aiden. "I always knew you'd do something big. And becoming a lawyer..."

Drake was even more irritated with how thrilled everyone was that Aiden would be a lawyer. Wasn't the stereotype that everyone hated lawyers?

"I just can't believe that in a few short years, you'll be having a wonderful career."

Yeah, wonderful career. Never speaking to his family except for a letter every now and then.

"It's a shame your brother doesn't have the same work ethic."

Drake's eyebrows shot down. He knew Mrs. Hayfer hated him. He knew it was because he didn't do his classwork, but that didn't mean he had no work ethic. He put his energies into other things like his music, and that's what he wanted to do with his life. That was how he made money now.

"It would have been nice to see the two of you working in a law firm together someday."

"Well," Aiden replied. "I suppose, but it's not going to happen."

And he's perfectly fine with that.

"I've been telling Drake being a musician won't work out for him," Aiden continued. "He's got to be more realistic."

"Well, sometimes you can't get through to people," said Mrs. Hayfer.

Drake's hands clenched into fists. How dare they talk about him like that when he was only ten feet away?

"I always loved you as a student," Mrs. Hayfer told Aiden.

"I know."


	6. How Things Have Changed

A/N: I know this is a little short, and I know I haven't updated in a while. This chapter had me a little stuck on the writing. Hopefully it will go more smoothly.

_Chapter Six: How Things Have Changed_

* * *

_Christmas, ten years ago..._

Seven year old Drake Parker tore the shiny red paper off of a small box from under the Christmas tree and delighted at the present inside. It was a guitar pick, much like the one his brother Aiden had. Drake pulled the pick out of the box and looked at it in awe.

"Drake," said his father. "What do you say to your brother?"

"Thanks, Aiden," said Drake, finally recalling who had given him the gift. Drake wanted to learn how to play the guitar, but his parents didn't believe he was quite old enough yet, but his big brother gave him his first guitar pick. Even if he didn't have a guitar to play, it meant a lot. And maybe this meant Aiden would let Drake try his guitar.

"No problem," said Aiden, smiling. He had to admit, when his father first came home seven years ago and told him he'd be getting a little brother, Aiden Parker wasn't very happy. However, he'd grown to love his little brother Drake more than he thought he would.

Little Megan was delighting over her stocking, the fifth of the family's, and pulling out her goodies one by one.

Brian Parker wrapped his arm around his wife and smiled at their children. He knew perfection was impossible, but he often felt he had perfection. He had a wonderful family. A loving wife and beautiful children. And maybe it was best that it stay his thought. He would never know how his sons would someday grow to feel disdain for each other. He had no idea that future events would do more harm than would be normally expected.

* * *

_One year later..._

Drake picked up the stuffed dog his mother had bought him for Christmas and sat with it in his lap. Aiden had been mean again. The little eight-year-old boy's only companion was Woofy, the little stuffed siberian husky puppy he'd gotten as a gift that year. Drake smoothed the soft fur of the stuffed toy as he watched his little sister play with her new blocks.

Four stockings lay on the table while the fifth remained hanging on the mantel. Santa hadn't filled that one. Drake was too old now to believe in Santa Claus, but he and Aiden couldn't ruin it for Megan, so they pretended he existed.

Sometimes Drake wished he did still believe in Santa Claus. Everything would seem less complicated. He wouldn't have to understand what was going on around him. He could be little and oblivious. But that couldn't happen.

It could never happen. He could wish and hope all he wanted, but he knew it would never happen. It was something he couldn't get past. Mainly because it was all his fault. That's what Aiden said anyway. And Drake had always looked up to Aiden, so he believed him when he said it was Drake's fault. But Drake couldn't understand why Aiden was angry. Their mother wasn't angry with him. Shouldn't she be the most angry in this case? But she wasn't, so was it possible that Aiden was wrong? And why did he have to be so mean? It might have been Drake's fault, but he couldn't have prevented it either. Aiden just didn't seem to understand that.

* * *

_This year..._

Megan glanced up from the photo album she'd been flipping through. Aiden was helping mess around with the last of the decorations. It was a few days before Christmas, and the only one missing from the room was Drake. He was upstairs in his own room, still not happy about Aiden being home for the holidays.

Megan may have been young, but she definitely wasn't ignorant to what was going on around her. Something had happened many years ago to cause her two older brothers to loathe each other. As terrible as she thought it was, she knew Drake had to have a reason for him not to want his older brother around. Maybe sometimes she played pranks on them and enjoyed watching them suffer, but that was how Megan showed her affection for them. It was a little strange, actually, but she wondered if it came from whatever happened that long ago. She had learned from Aiden how to get out of things at an early age, and it had helped her so far. But now Drake and Aiden were acting very strange. Why did they not get along? Could the events that took place then still be simmering inside their heads? Which one would turn off the burner? They had to realize once and for all exactly what happened.

Megan knew she wasn't going to get any answers sitting on the sofa. She hopped onto the floor and hurried to her room to prepare for the coming days.


	7. The Truths Begin to Form

A/N: Eeek, I haven't updated in over two months. Ah. School isn't being kind to me when it comes to this. I do have an update for you, though. And I know how I'm going to finish this, so we'll see what I can get done.

_Chapter Seven: The Truths Begin to Form_

* * *

Christmas Eve definitely wasn't the way Drake wanted it to be. He wanted Aiden out of the house and gone for good. Actually, he would have preferred it if Aiden had never shown up at the door, never written that letter to their mother. But there he was, laughing with her in the kitchen as he helped decorate Christmas cookies. That was supposed to be Drake's job. It had been even when they were growing up. It was one of the few times he actually liked to help in the kitchen. Maybe because he could sneak a few candies and cookies, but it was something he had always done with his mother, and why should this year be different? But it was. 

"What's with you?" asked Megan, staring at Drake as he lie on the sofa. "You're acting even worse than when Josh told you he was done with you. And I thought it couldn't get any worse than that."

Drake picked himself up off of the sofa.

"Well, excuse me," he said, as he passed her without saying anymore. What was the point? She didn't get it. No one would get it. Why did he have to be the one with this weight in his chest? He lived with it everyday. Now that Aiden had shown up, it felt even heavier. He just wanted the feeling to go away.

The phone rang as Drake passed by and he debated answering it. They could just leave a message. If it was urgent, everyone had their cell phones. Drake nearly passed the phone, but he decided to answer it at the last minute. It would give him something to do to take his mind off of everything else anyway.

"Hello?" he said.

"Aiden?" came the voice on the other end.

Drake frowned and opened his mouth to correct the girl. Why did he have to sound like his brother? She continued talking before he could get a word out.

"Aiden, have you told your parents about the baby yet?"

Drake almost fell over. What baby? What was she talking about? It suddenly dawned on Drake. Aiden had gotten his girlfriend pregnant. Mr. Perfect messed up? This was interesting. While Aiden was an adult, their parents wouldn't be happy that Aiden wasn't married to this girl.

Drake hadn't heard any sort of talk like that between Aiden and his parents.

"No," said Drake. "I haven't because I'm not..."

"Would you mind telling me when you will?" the girl asked impatiently on the other end.

"I suppose when the time is right, but I wouldn't..." said Drake, slightly rolling his eyes as she cut him off again.

"That's what you said before. You said Christmas would be when the time was right. Well, it's the holiday season, so tell your parents about us."

She hung up the phone after that. Drake stared at the receiver and set it back in place. Aiden had done something wrong. And by every sentence she spoke, Drake knew exactly what it was.

* * *

Later that night, Drake was sleeping in his bed when he felt someone sitting at the foot of it. He opened one eye to see the figure of a young girl. 

"Megan," said Drake, glancing at the digital clock next to his bed, "it's 3:30 in the morning. And where's Josh?"

"He's getting a snack from the kitchen," Megan replied. "He should be back in a little while."

"Okay," said Drake, "and what are you doing in here?"

"We need to talk about this situation."

"What situation?"

"With Aiden."

"What with Aiden?"

"Don't be such a boob. You're the one who answered the phone."

"How do you know about that?"

"Phone tap."

"Of course," said Drake, turning over to go back to sleep.

"Hey!"

"You know what, Megan, I think I'll take this information and deal with it myself. And don't you mess anything up."

"You really think you're smart enough to put this information to good use?"

"Megan..."

"What?"

"Listen," Drake said, sitting straight up and startling Megan. "This is my issue to deal with, not your's. I will handle Aiden. Just leave it alone."

"Why are you acting like this? Just let me help, and everything will be fine."

"This has nothing to do with you, Megan. You don't understand. No one understands but me."

"Maybe if you'd..."

"No, Megan. That isn't going to work. There is nothing that anyone can do about it. It's on me. It's always been on me."

"Drake, what are you talking about?"

"Nothing that you could possibly understand."

"Fine," said Megan, slipping down off of Drake's bed and quietly making her way out of the bedroom.

Drake watched his little sister walk out of the room. He couldn't answer her questions. She wouldn't be as willing to help him with the Aiden problem if she knew the truth. Drake felt bad enough as it was. He didn't need someone else to know, someone else to keep blaming him. Aiden had done it enough, and Drake had always suspected somewhat that their mother did but never said anything because a mother should never say that about her son. Drake felt tears form in his eyes as he thought about what his own mother must think of him.

Josh walked back into the room as Drake felt a tear roll down his cheek. He rubbed it and his eyes quickly. Josh slipped back under his blankets, knowing Drake hadn't wanted him to see him wiping his eyes. Josh was quiet for a moment. He couldn't keep still any longer. He couldn't just sit back and watch Drake grow more insane in his older brother's presence.

"Drake," said Josh.

"Yeah?" Drake asked, looking up and hoping he'd hid his tears from his brother.

"What's going on? And don't tell me nothing. You've told me it was nothing from the beginning, but I'm not an idiot. It's something. Now what is it?"

"It's nothing you would understand."

"Try me."

"Trust me, Josh. Of all the times I've screwed up, this is the biggest and worst."

"What are you talking about? What does this have to do with Aiden being here?"

"It just makes me think of it. Now I really don't want to discuss it. It'll be Christmas morning soon."

"But..." Josh couldn't finish his sentence. Drake had turned out the light again and turned over. He was done for the night. No more talking. Something was wrong, though, Josh knew that. Drake was feeling guilty about something, but Josh didn't know what it was.


	8. Placing the Blame

_Chapter Eight: Placing the Blame_

* * *

Christmas morning had arrived as it always did, and Drake was sitting on the sofa in the living room watching Josh and Megan examine their presents. Drake had opened his, but he wasn't very excited about them. He just felt like he couldn't be. Of course, he wasn't as unhappy as he was when Aiden first arrived. 

After a while, Audrey finally got up to go make Christmas breakfast while Walter said he'd help. Josh had gotten a new game for his computer, and he wanted to try it out before breakfast. Megan looked from her oldest brother to the other before leaving the room to see if there was anything she could pull that day. After all, it wouldn't be Christmas to her without messing with her brothers at least once.

Drake and Aiden were left in the room alone. Aiden was sitting below the tree, arranging presents, so they wouldn't make a mess on the floor.

"Enjoying yourself?" Drake asked.

"Of course, little brother," Aiden replied with that same smirk he'd been wearing since he arrived.

"Good. Keep that feeling in mind because it won't last."

"What are you talking about?" the older of the two boys asked as he stood up.

"There was a phone call last night from a girl. Something about telling Mom and Dad about a baby."

Aiden went red. He whipped around.

"Why did she tell you about that!"

"She thought I was you. We sound a lot alike, you know."

"Don't you..."

"There's absolutely nothing to stop me from telling Mom about this."

"You're forgetting a few things. Mom loves me. Besides, this is nothing compared to what you did."

Drake's own face went red. How _dare_ he bring that up. His anger and guilt blinded him for a moment. How was he supposed to fix something like that? How could Aiden throw that in his face now? It was only because Drake knew something. He couldn't let Aiden get to him.

"And what's with calling Walter, 'Dad'? Walter isn't Dad. Of course, I wonder if you'd know that."

Drake tried to focus on the carpet. He wanted to leave, but he couldn't move.

"You wouldn't know the first thing about being a good son."

Drake snapped his head back. That had done it. Drake burst from his spot and ran into Aiden, knocking him over. It was something Drake had wanted to do for years. Now that he'd finally done it, it felt good. Drake didn't care that Aiden was his brother. He couldn't help the anger and guilt building up inside of him.

"You think you're going to get away with that?" Aiden asked Drake. He was ready to take a swing, but Eric punching Drake in the hall had only been a fluke. Drake ducked and ran under Aiden's arm and up the stairs. He ran to his room. Josh must have been in the bathroom because he wasn't at his computer. Drake felt the tears grow hot in his eyes. Regardless of how much Aiden had tormented him, it was the truth. He didn't know the first thing about being a good son. He shut the bedroom door and slid down, leaning against the door. He cried silently. He always had about this. Just like his guilt and fear, it was all silent. He didn't want anyone to hear. It was never spoken of either. That was why.

Drake felt the door begin to press against him. Was Aiden back for more?

"Drake?" came the voice that Drake would always appreciate at a time like this. He just didn't know if now would be better with Josh there. If Josh knew, he'd just hate him as much as Aiden did.

"Drake, would you let me in?"

Drake sighed. Maybe it was better to just get it over with. Josh would hate him, and it would be the end of it. No more hiding it. Maybe it would actually feel better. But his brother would hate him. He finally stood up and opened the door.

"Drake?" said Josh again. He had never seen Drake like this before. He remembered seeing him soaking wet and apologizing over and over again for being the worst brother in the world, but this was even worse. Drake looked almost defeated. "Do you want to talk about it?" Josh asked.

"You'll hate me," Drake replied. "But I probably owe you an explanation. You deserve to know who your brother is."

"Drake, I'm sure that I won't hate you for whatever it is. I mean, it can't be that bad."

"Oh, yes, it can."

"Drake..."

"No, I'm going to explain. First, you wanted to know about the bedroom situation when Aiden first got here, though. Yes, we used to share the room. He slept on the loft. I got the lower bed, and all I wanted was the loft. When Aiden finally left, I got what I wanted, but he tormented me so much when we were little that I...I couldn't stand to look at that lower bed anymore. When Scottie needed somewhere to keep those drums, I volunteered my room. And Mom agreed as long as I didn't play them in the house."

"So, that's why the drums were here."

"Yes."

"Drake, it doesn't bother you when I'm here, does it?"

"No, Josh," Drake responded. "You know how to be a brother, and you don't torment me the way he did. It's easier to accept."

A look of relief seemed to come over Josh's face, but then he asked, "But, Drake, why did he torment you so much?"

Drake knew he couldn't put this off anymore. He had to tell Josh. Josh was going to hate him, but it was better it was done now.

"You know how when we're little, we want something so much that we don't think aboout the cost?" Drake finally asked.

"You mean like when we ask for a bike or something?"

"Yeah. I did that. I wanted to play baseball."

"But, Drake, you don't like sports now."

"No, but at the time, I wanted to play more than anything, and my dad let me join little league. He was thrilled because he had played in high school. We'd always have that thing to bond over and talk about now."

"So what was the problem?"

"Dad managed to go to most of my games, but there were some he just couldn't go to because of work. He'd at least pick me up after every game, though, and buy me an ice cream whether we won or lost."

"Doesn't seem so bad," Josh said.

"No, it wasn't. And I had a lot of fun playing. I was glad I did something that made me and Dad happy, and I understood when he couldn't be there because he would always come get me at the end anyway. That changed one day, though."

"What happened?"

Drake sat on the couch and set his jaw. He really didn't want to tell this part of the story. It was the reason for everything. The reason for Aiden's tormenting, for their anger at each other, and the reason Drake felt he had to change, to be more like his brother in some ways.

"One day," Drake began again, "Dad was late. It was only by fifteen minutes then, so I wasn't too worried. Soon all the other parents left, though. The coach sat with me. After an hour, he got worried and called Mom. She didn't know where Dad was either."

"Did you ever find out?" Josh asked, still standing near the door.

"Mom came to get me," Drake continued without answering Josh right away. "We got home and tried calling Dad's office, but he didn't answer the phone there. About a half hour later, the hospital called. They wanted Mom to come in. She didn't tell me what was going on but left me with Aiden and took Megan to the neighbor's. She didn't say anything to Aiden either. I don't think she wanted us to worry. It didn't matter, though. We were worried anyway. Even though Aiden kept telling me everything would be all right..."

"Wait a minute," Josh said. "You've always said you and Aiden didn't get along..."

"We did at first. We used to be really close. This was all before this happened."

"What did happen?"

"Dad got in an accident on the way to get me that day. He didn't make it." Drake felt the hot tears begin to form at the corners of his eyes again. "When Mom told us what happened, Aiden started to act angry. If I tried to go near him, he'd yell at me. I'd always ask what was wrong, and one day he told me it was me. If I hadn't begged so hard to play little league, if I didn't need Dad to pick me up everyday, he'd still be here. He told me it was my fault. For everything. And all I can figure is that he was right."

"Drake," said Josh. "That doesn't make it your fault. These things happen..."

"He was on his way to get me!" Drake shouted, standing up. "If I hadn't played that game, he wouldn't have had to take that road at that time to come get me. He'd still be here."

"But Drake..."

"Don't you see it, Josh? It's all my fault."

"Drake," said Josh, but his brother pushed past him and out the door. Josh watched him head down the hall and up to the attic. He wondered if he should follow Drake or leave him alone. Some Christmas this was turning out to be for the middle Parker child.


	9. Dust Covered Memories

A/N: I know I haven't updated in a month. Writers block again and being busy. I'm going to try and get this story done, though. I'll be gone for a few days, so later next week is a possible time for an update.

_Chapter Nine: Dust Covered Memories_

* * *

Drake hadn't looked back when he left the bedroom. He didn't want to see the look on Josh's face as the realizations would finally dawn on him. 

Drake crawled into a back corner of the attic and shut his eyes. He just wanted things to be the way they were before Aiden showed up. Why this year? Why not in a few more years when Drake was gone if Aiden still hated him that much? Of course it was because Aiden's girlfriend was pushing him to tell Audrey that she was pregnant. At least she knew what needed to be done. Aiden apparently wasn't too thrilled to deliver this news.

But why wouldn't he? To extend the greatness that is Aiden Parker would make Audrey simply gleeful. And make Drake sick to his stomach.

Growing even more irritated at the thought of another Aiden, Drake slammed his back into the wall. There was a thump and Drake rubbed the top of his head. He looked up to see a baseball rolling away from him. Drake picked it up and stared at it. He turned it in his hands before standing up and looking at the shelf from where it had fallen. Drake found a shoebox covered in at least eight years worth of dust. He blew at it and recognized it immediately. Almost as if he was afraid to disturb the memories inside, Drake carefully removed the lid from the box. He looked through the contents. There were little things inside the box. A baseball cap that wouldn't fit anymore, a napkin from an ice cream shop, but at the bottom was something small, but it caught Drake's eye more than anything else. It was a blue guitar pick.

After placing everything back inside, Drake carefully carried the box back to his room. He eased open the door to make sure Josh had left. Since the coast was clear, Drake slipped inside and dumped all the contents onto his bed. He arranged everything into two piles: the things that reminded him of his father and the things that reminded him of Aiden. There wasn't much in the box, but it was enough. Drake took the things he felt close to because of his father and opened the trunk at the end of his bed. There was a baseball bat and a glove already inside. There was also a small uniform that wouldn't fit Drake, but maybe a boy who was seven. Drake placed the memories of his father inside and shut the trunk. They shouldn't collect dust in the attic anymore. He then piled the memories of Aiden back in the shoebox and placed the lid back on top of it.

Drake slid off of his bed and headed downstairs. He was going to have to face the wrath of his parents for knocking Aiden over, he knew it. But he also had information that he knew Aiden hadn't given them yet. If he had, the entire house would have turned upside down. The fact that there was no state of chaos yet was evidence enough to Drake that Aiden's secret was still safe.

After making his way to the living room and receiving a knowing look from Megan, Drake pushed open the door to the kitchen where his parents were standing with Aiden.

"Drake," said Audrey. "What's going on? Why on Christmas? Why when you haven't seen your brother in so long?"

"Why don't you ask _him_ why?" Drake replied with anger in his voice. "When he hasn't tried to visit in so long. He's had breaks, summers off, why not until now?"

Drake didn't wait for his mother to respond. "He got his girlfriend pregnant, and he came to tell you in person because he couldn't do it in a letter or on the phone because his girlfriend has more sense than he does."

Audrey turned to stare at Aiden, "Well, that's silly. Aiden, I'm not sure why..."

"Oh, it's true, Mom," said Aiden. "But Drake only has half the story." Drake received a smirk from Aiden before he continued. "I'm going to propose to her. We'll get married quickly enough. A small ceremony. She won't show and be embarrassed."

"Oh, Aiden!" Audrey exclaimed. "This is wonderful!"

Drake suddenly wanted nothing more than to pummel Aiden. There was no way Aiden had been planning that all this time. He had only done it to one up Drake.

Too upset to think straight, Drake tore himself from the kitchen and flew up the stairs to his bedroom again. Megan jumped as he ran through the living room. She wandered into the kitchen to see what was happening.

When Drake finally made it to his room, he slammed the door shut and stared hard at the wood. He was angry and tired and frustrated all at the same time. Why? Why, why, why?

"So, things don't seem to be getting much better?"

Drake felt his scalp prickle at the sound of the voice. He didn't want to turn around. He didn't want to see the look of disgust, of hatred. But Drake knew he had to face it someday, so he turned around to hear what his brother had to say.


	10. The Truth Comes Out

A/N: Well, I can only apologize so much for the delayed updates. All I can say is school is keeping me really busy this year. Thankfully, the winter semester is halfway over, and I have an update. I know how the remainder of the chapters are going to be set up. There's about three more after this, unless I change something.

_Chapter Ten: The Truth Comes Out_

* * *

"I...I..." Drake stammered.

"You what?" asked Josh.

Drake couldn't look at his brother. He couldn't bear to see the look of hatred on his face.

Finally, Drake sighed. It wasn't like he'd never seen a look like that. How often had Aiden looked at him that way? He'd lost one brother because of this. Might as well lose the other and get it over with. He thought about Megan. There was a pang in his chest. What if she was angry with him too?

Drake slowly looked up into Josh's eyes. However, instead of seeing a cold, hateful stare, Josh's eyes were full of concern. Drake was confused. It was his fault. Why should Josh feel bad for him?

"Drake," Josh began. "I know you've spent the last nine years blaming yourself for what happened, but man, you have to stop."

"How can I when it's the truth? How can I knowing that if it hadn't been for..."

"It has nothing to do with it." Josh couldn't understand why Drake was blaming himself. It was bad enough Aiden had brought him down. How could Drake have listened to him? Cool, suave, no-one-could-ever-bring-him-down Drake? "Drake, why did you listen to him? Why did you let him get to you like that?"

Drake was quiet for a moment. He had to reflect. "Because he's Aiden," Drake finally said slowly.

Josh let out a frustrated sigh. After all he had said about Aiden?

He frowned. "You always said Aiden wasn't as great as he acted. You said it was all just to keep your parents happy. You said he stopped caring about you and blamed you..."

"Did it ever occur to you, Josh," Drake interrupted, "that as much as he hated me, I didn't stop caring about him?"

"But..."

"He was my brother, Josh. I looked up to him for years. Of course I believed him when he told me it was my fault. I believed him because I loved him."

"Do you still?" Josh asked.

"I love the brother I used to have. I don't know about this one. I don't know him."

Drake was silent again. He let his own words sink in. He wasn't quite sure he had understood what was happening. Now he did. He'd wanted approval. He'd wanted to be accepted. This was it, though. He was not going to become Aiden. He wasn't going to miss the wedding of someone important to him just because he had "better" things to do. He wasn't going to crush anyone's dreams. And he was not going to ever blame Megan for something that happened by accident.

"Drake," said Josh after a moment. "It was an accident. And you weren't even there."

"I know that now," said Drake. "I guess I just never let myself think this way. It's just so hard when your whole family talks about how great and how smart he is. I wanted to be like that. I wanted everyone to accept me, but part of me was so sick of the way he treated me that I gave up on school. I didn't care anymore. I think that was the part of me that knew he was wrong, but I couldn't handle it better because he messed me up with his accusations. And the part of me that wanted approval was the cool guy. The one all the girls liked. The one who decided to join a band and someday be a big rock star. I wanted that. I wanted to be accepted." Drake stopped. He hadn't known this was how he felt. For nine years, he had never been able to figure it out. Now it seemed easy. What was different about now?

"So you wanted to be cool like Aiden so you would feel accepted by everyone after what happened?"

"I guess, when I was little, I wanted to be just like him, but after my dad died, everything changed. I think my self esteem was crushed, and that's why school slipped. It was easier to be the cool guy. Of course, Aiden still does it better."

"Hey," said Josh. "As far as I'm concerned, you're the cool one, bro."

"Josh..."

"No, really. You've done a lot for me. Remember when you helped me get back together with Mindy? And everyone else. You've been there. He hasn't. He's been sitting pretty up in Cambridge. He's missed a lot, but you haven't. Even though you're on your way to becoming a big star, I know you won't miss anything either. You're just not like that—whether you want to believe it or not. And anyway, you're more awesome with music because you actually have a talent for creating it instead of just repeating what you hear on your old records. I mean, he's obviously got an ear to do that, but what else has he got? No, Drake. You're cool because you're Drake, not because you wanted to be like Aiden."

"Thanks, Josh." Drake smiled a little, his first real smile since Aiden had arrived.

"That's what brothers are for," Josh replied.

"Yeah, I know that now," Drake said. He paused for a moment. "Now what, though? He's still here. I don't know if I can go back downstairs."

Josh sighed. He should have figured that this would still be hard on Drake. He needed to face this, but he also needed to take his time.

"Don't worry," Josh responded. "Just come down whenever you're ready. Things will work out. As long as you believe that he's wrong about this, he can't hurt you." Josh glanced at the clock. "I promised Mom that I'd help with dinner, but remember what we talked about."

Josh left Drake alone in the bedroom to think everything over. How could he let things get this bad? How could he let it last this long? It didn't matter anymore. It was over. Well, not quite. Drake knew he had to face Aiden. He had to confront him and tell him the way he really felt. Drake opened his bedroom door to find Megan. He froze, staring at his little sister. He hadn't talked to her about this yet. He didn't know if she'd understand.

"Why does he blame you?" she asked. Drake looked taken aback for a minute. "I mean," she continued, "why would someone as smart as he is blame you when it's not your fault?"

"I thought...how did you...?"

"Oh, of course I knew. How would I not?"

"Good point." Drake sighed. "I don't know why he blames me. Sorry I can't answer that for you."

"I know why. I just wondered if you knew the answer yourself."

Drake shook his head, slightly irritated. "Did you plan on telling me what it was?"

"You don't get it, do you? He couldn't handle Dad dying, and now he's missed so much, it's all he's got to hold onto. He doesn't understand that things could be different. His anger is his only connection to you—his only connection to Dad. That's why he won't let it go."

"You really think so?" Drake asked. Megan would be right about something like this. She was too smart not to be.

"That and I think he hates to be wrong," she replied.

"So maybe Josh is right," said Drake. "Maybe I am the cooler one and the one who was around more."

"I don't know about being cool," said Megan, always playing the part of the little sister, "but he's right about you being around. You haven't missed anything important. Now, if we're finished. I have to take care of something."

"What?" asked Drake. He didn't like when she planned things. It always meant disaster for him.

"Nothing you need to worry about," said Megan. "It's for Aiden. I mean, I have to catch up," she smiled, devilishly.

Drake watched her nervously as she left the room. He didn't want to know what she was planning. The less he knew, the better. He had his own problem anyway. Did he try and make Aiden understand or let things between them stay the same? Drake had to confront him. He felt he could never really get past this if he didn't. He didn't care what happened anymore. Drake had made a step up, but he would still be stuck if he didn't talk to him. If things were left unsaid, nothing would get better. He might slip back and then what would happen?

The thought of confrontation scared Drake to death. He'd never dared to challenge Aiden in the past. No one did. It simply wasn't done. Maybe it was best for them both. Drake's fear was that Aiden was too stubborn to let it go. Maybe Megan was right. Maybe he did it because he didn't have anything to hold onto anymore. If that was the case, though, Aiden would never admit it. So Drake wondered if it would really be worth it to confront him. However, if he did, Aiden would know how he felt whether he accepted the truth or not. It would all be out there. Josh was right, as long as Drake knew the truth, Aiden's blind anger couldn't hurt him anymore.


	11. Confronting the Past

A/N: I really have no excuse for being so late. This'll teach me to do a WIP without being a few chapters ahead. Anyway, this is second to last chapter. I hope you enjoy it. I'm not sure if it seems too short or not. You be the judge. And I apologize for screwing up by posting this and then deleting because I messed up. You might have gotten two notifications about this one.

_Chapter Eleven: Confronting the Past_

* * *

Drake stood in the doorway, trembling. He stepped outside and quietly made his way toward his brother. The older boy was silent. Drake gulped and reached up his hand to tug at his brother's sleeve.

"Aiden...?"

"Don't you touch me," Aiden snarled, yanking his arm from the smaller boy's grasp.

"But...I'm...I'm scared."

"You should be. Dad's gone now, and you know why? Because he just had to go and get you the other day. It's all your fault."

Aiden sounded angrier with every passing moment.

"I didn't..."

"If he didn't have to get you, he wouldn't have gotten in that accident."

"I'm sorry..." Drake said, his voice shaking.

"That won't make anything better."

Drake took a step back. He felt tears well up in his eyes. It was his fault. His dad wasn't coming back, and it was his fault. He ran back into the house as the tears slid down his cheeks. His brother hated him. His mom probably did too, but she would never say it. Neither one would ever forgive him.

* * *

Nine years later, Drake stood in the same doorway, looking across the grass at Aiden. The younger boy stood tall and firm. His jaw was set, and he wasn't going to let anything phase him. None of it was his fault.

Drake made his way across the lawn. He took every step with dignity, yet a tiny part of him wanted to turn back and run into the house. He convinced himself that this time would not be like that.

"Aiden," Drake said, standing behind the taller brother.

"What?" he turned around. "Oh, it's you. Going to knock me over again? Maybe kick me when I'm down this time?"

"You mean like you did to me?" Drake growled.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"You know exactly what I'm talking about," he snarled. "You made me believe Dad's death was **my** fault. You made me hate myself. You made me think Mom hated me. Do you have any idea how I've lived these past nine years?"

"Hopefully with the guilt you deserve," Aiden spat. "It is your fault. If he hadn't gone to pick you up that day..."

"If he hadn't been doing what any father would have done, picking up his child from baseball practice. What if he'd been picking you up from school. What then? Would it be your fault or would it have been just an accident?"

"I think you're confusing things here. _You_ were the one with baseball practice. _You_ were the one Dad went to pick up that day. If it hadn't been for _you_..."

"Just shut up!"

Aiden stared hard at Drake. He had never dared to talk to him that way before.

"How can you be so angry?" Drake asked. "How can you be so hateful? You're going to be a father. Do you even love that girl? I can't imagine someone like you loving someone that way. Not your child, not your child's mother. You need to grow up, Aiden. You need to realize that there are people in this world other than yourself that count. I don't care what you're going to be. I don't care how much money you'll make. I don't care that my path is a shot in the dark. It doesn't change anything. You're supposed to be my brother. I haven't been able to count on you like I'm supposed to count on you."

"When you do things like that..."

"I did NOTHING." He was right, he'd done nothing. Aiden couldn't deny it. "Blaming me isn't going to help you get over Dad's death. Running away from this house did nothing to help you. You claim you hate me."

"Because you played that ridiculous game. That took away Dad!"

Drake suddenly realized. It wasn't that it was his fault; it was the fact that he and their father had bonded over something Aiden didn't. Drake couldn't remember Aiden and their dad doing anything like that together. Megan was right; his anger was all he had. Rather, it was all he thought he had.

"You know," Drake started again; his voice was softer this time. "I feel sorry for you. You should have realized Mom and I cared. You should have realized you and Dad were closer than you thought. You should have realized that being angry with one person could never make this better. Instead you ended up living nine years resenting me, convinced that I was the thing to be angry with because you didn't want to admit that you'd let Dad down. Aiden. The Golden Boy. Let his own father down. That could never be you, could it? And all just because you thought there was nothing in common?"

"I don't know _what_ you're talking about."

"Aiden. Whether Dad was alive or not, if you'd kept up your grades and kept making something of yourself, he would have been proud. I think it's sad that you didn't see that."

"You still have no idea what you're talking about."

"Aiden..."

"I think we're finished, Drake. We don't need to see each other anymore if we're just going to argue everytime we get together."

Aiden trudged back across the lawn and slammed the door shut as he went inside the house. Drake sighed. They hadn't come to terms. Drake didn't mind. He had at least seen the truth. He wasn't to blame, and Aiden's accusation had only grown out of something he thought he didn't have. The truth was, at least, a small stepping stone for Drake.

Drake had been facing the gate one moment only to hear a loud yell the next. It sounded like someone who had been taken by surprise. It was the way Drake used to sound when Megan pranked him the first few times. There was no surprise in his shouts anymore, just the realization that she had, once again, hatched an evil plan that worked. Drake turned around to see Aiden, covered in egg nog, water balloons littering the floor around him. Drake didn't even have to guess who was behind that.

* * *

Drake sat on his loft bed, looking out at the driveway as his mother said goodbye to Aiden. Shortly after he realized what Aiden was really angry at, Drake felt upset that he'd thought his mother was angry with him. She couldn't be. Drake decided that would be his next focus. He could work on Aiden if he ever saw him again. Aiden could come around. He was stubborn, but he was smart. Maybe someday he would realize he and Drake could work things out. It was a little easier now that Drake understood, but Aiden had to admit what was bothering him. That was something he just wasn't ready to do.

"Hey," Josh said, as he walked into the room, picking up his laptop case.

"Hey," Drake replied, in a better mood than he'd been the entire time Aiden was there.

"Glad he's leaving?" Josh asked.

"No," Drake responded. "It isn't that. I'm glad it's over. I actually feel sorry for him now. Maybe someday we can get along, but right now, he's got some heavy thinking to do. I don't know if he'll do it or not, but time'll tell."

"You know, Drake, I think you've grown up a little bit with Aiden's visit."

"You think so?" Drake asked, grinning. "Hey, where are you going?"

"To the library with Eric and Craig. We're going to get a jump on the big research project in history."

"Josh, that isn't due until the end of January."

"I know, but we want to get started."

"But it's still Christmas vacation," Drake said.

"And your point? When did you plan on starting your project, the morning it's due?"

"Actually..."

"Forget what I said about growing up."

* * *

Drake kicked dirt over the box as he stood staring at it in it's small hole. Aiden couldn't let go of the past. He couldn't accept the accidents in his life. He couldn't move from that one spot. He couldn't see that it was no one's fault.

But Drake could.

In a world where he looked like Aiden and sounded like Aiden, Drake Parker had something Aiden didn't. He could see the world through different eyes. He could see that bad things would happen, but good ones did too. Even if he'd been upset that his mom was remarrying in the beginning, wasn't Josh his best friend? Aiden could only see the loss. He could only focus on what he didn't have, what he thought he didn't have. Drake could only hope that Aiden would someday learn. That someday he would realize that their Dad was proud of him.

Drake carefully covered the box of mementos from his angry past with his brother with dirt. He stood up and brushed his hands on his jeans. Things would be easier now.

Now, Drake could remember. All Aiden had wanted was approval from their dad, and that was why he tried so hard. He couldn't see what Drake saw, though. Drake saw their dad smile when he went through the report cards in the mail. Drake saw him get excited when Aiden won a new award. Aiden couldn't see it because he felt he needed something else, something more.

Someday, maybe. Someday.


End file.
